Vanilla Milk

I wanted to post this a few days back, but the internet connection failed me, so behold =) ...

Of all the things I know and fully or partially understand, there's just one puny little thing in this ironically bizarre world that I certain do not understand at all! Why is there vanilla flavoured milk? It cannot possibly come from the cows in our dairy farm unless they have been genetically modified to produce vanilla oils, so some high ambitious, yet unknowingly idiotic mad scientist must have added the vanilla extract into the milk in the first place! So tell me, you sad bane of the human society, does it actually taste better? Does it make the milk a thousand times more nutritious? Does it gives us human super powers or less susceptible to sexually transmitted diseases or some incurable malignant infection? Or simplest of all, does it make it lower the lactose content and make it safer for the lactose intolerant?

It happened again, today! My dad went shopping and bought me milk because I do love milk! And when I untwisted the cap, ripped off the foil cover and poured myself half a cup, I felt something bad was going to happen. Much to my expectations, as soon as I tilted the cup so that the seemingly lovely liquid mixture of milk will flow into my mouth, I tasted the most hatred taste when associated to milk: vanilla! I swear I tried my best not to swear at that moment ...

Don't get me wrong. I love milk more than I love most other types of food. And I don't mind vanilla in pastries and confectionaries, but vanilla and milk is just plain disgusting! I remember there was once a few months back when I took a gulp vanilla flavoured milk and the taste was so strong that I got a headache that didn't recover until the next day. I knew I wasn't allergic to vanilla so from that day on, I took a personal decision to boycott all vanilla flavoured milk! So evil scientist, why would you want to harm this innocent little boy who loves milk so much? If I hated that flavour so much, imagine how many million other people in this world you might teach to hate milk throught your wondrous formula ...

I don't know anyone who likes the vanilla taste in milk. I believe it's an abomination and anyone who loves it should be annihilated so as to not ensure it's survival, Darwin's style! Come on, if you just cannot learn to enjoy the original fragrant smell and taste of milk, just stop drinking it and seek your nutritions from some other less-harmful-to-people-like-me source! I know eggs are a good source of nutrition, but please don't come up with some fanciful flavour for eggs because I, too love eggs!

So to all vanilla milk lovers out there, curse you! I hope you all die in the deepest depth of hell for science is your excuse of masking the lovely smell of milk with some odd combination that's worse than baby puke ...

P.S. Sorry if I have offended anyone =)


-hwg-